Parents, the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy has designated October as "Let's Talk" Month. So, let's talk about sex and more. Here are tips to get started or take the next step in talking to your children and teens about sexuality.
- Remember it's never too early or too late to begin or continue discussions about sexuality with your children. Instead of "the talk," incorporate many ongoing conversations about sexuality, dating, and relationships into their growing up years.
- Young children need to know correct names for body parts, and the correct information about how babies are made. Their honest questions deserve honest, respectful, and truthful answers. Don't laugh or giggle, even if what they say or ask is cute. Give them the straight scoop.
- Let your child know what's coming up during puberty before he or she gets there. Include information for both sexes about bodily changes such as menstruation and erections. Help them understand in a calm, loving matter-of-fact way about hair growth, voice changes, perspiration changes, smells, and other things that will be happening to their body.
- By middle school, your child should have a basic understanding about sexual intercourse, oral and anal sex, stds, how pregnancy occurs, contraception, and your values. Middle schoolers are going to learn about sex. It's much more empowering for them to have complete and accurate information from a parent or trusted adult before they hear everything from their peers.
- Talk to your child about the success sequence. Click here for more information.
- Also discuss relationships--how they should start out as friendships, include trust, respect, shared interests, and caring. If they don't, it's time to move on. Also discuss that, if sex is the price of being in a relationship, it's too high. Click here for more information.
- Remember to have a conversation, not a lecture. Your teen may disagree with some of your values, but let them know what they are and why you have them anyway. Listen to their view. The important thing is to keep having conversations and keep thinking about this very important topic.
Keep talking, parents! Here are more resources:
Ten Tips for Parents when talking to teens
More resources for parents and educators
Amy Johnson, MSW, is a Personal Life and Parent Coach who is passionate about working with parents regarding balance, self-care and faith and sexuality. She is co-author of the book, Parenting by Strengths: A Parent's Guide to Challenging Situations. To read more by Amy, go to her website. Amy is also a member of the Best Parent Coaching Directory. Click here to contact Amy.
